I went there myself
for the safety and health
of the VIPs.
But then I forgot
all the training I'd got
as we played the green.
It's all fine and well
for the plebeians
to be quarantined.
Covid-19 is much worse than a cold.
I mean, what's it to you,
you're the dirt on our shoes
after playing the course.
We shook sweaty palms
and gave zero damns
about feeling hoarse.
We shouted the odds,
just like demi-gods,
as we scoffed our roast.
Covid-19 is much worse than a cold.
We sneezed and we coughed
as we fought for the trough,
no heed of risk.
We guffawed and we pranced,
rubbed shoulders and danced,
'til our droplets mixed.
Not one thought for our families;
huddled up clammily
taking the piss.
Covid-19 is much worse than a cold.
We can feed them all day
with a PR parade
and a good old show.
We can keep a straight face
and repeatedly say
that together we row.
We don't give a feck
that we're on the top deck
and they're down below.
Covid-19 is much worse than a cold.
We kicked up our heels
though the many bereaved
couldn't mourne.
We played with the faith
of those who remained
all alone.
We laughed at the lives
that have been sacrificed
in nursing homes.
Covid-19 is much worse than a cold.
(The rhythm is based on Adelaide's Lament from Guys And Dolls. The refrain in that is 'A person might develop a cold' or slight variations on it.
Flaherty is a reference to John Flaherty, The Captain of the Guard in Leinster House, the person with responsibility for health and safety for the staff there.
As to the content I will just say #golfgate, and provide links, I am too disgusted to explain:
